Mission Statement and Policies

Love After Life

We are dedicated to providing support and assistance to those who have a ROMANTIC partner who has died and crossed over to the afterlife.

We are also advocates for the social acceptance of the decision to not repartner as one continues his or her romantic relationship with the partner who has crossed over. It is already a valid, socially acceptable choice to repartner, and we accept that repartnering is a personal decision unrelated to the quality and depth of the love one has for their crossed-over partner.

Overall, the purpose of this group is to be a resource for individuals to feel closer to their partner on the other side and foster a better experience of that partner while living. While we understand people are at varying stages of the grief process, our group aims to assist people through it - so they can come to appreciate that they can have a close and fulfilling relationship with that partner in the here and now and even feel joy experiencing life again.

The founders of the group, Mary Beth and William, are not psychics, mediums, grief counselors or psychologists; nor are we experts on the afterlife or afterlife relationships. We cannot attest to the quality or veracity of everything members of the group post, so please exercise your own discernment.

What we offer is our own experience, and the experiences of others in this community, in the spirit of supporting each other in the process of re-establishing and further developing our transdimensional relationship with our crossed-over loved ones. We also offer techniques, ideas, methods and resources that have helped us in acquiring, in the cases of the hosts and others, a happy, fulfilling, fun and adventurous ongoing relationship with our partners in the afterlife.

Members of the group also often share what can be highly personal and emotional experiences and feelings. This can often help others to realize they are not alone, that others here understand and can offer hope and suggestions about how to deal with what can be an extremely painful and chaotic grief experience.

As Facebook admins and Zoom Room hosts, it is our job and responsibility to moderate these venues in the best interest of our stated purpose and in what we feel is the best interest of this community. We appreciate your trust and will try to live up to it as best we can.

In pursuit of a positive and supportive community, and in light of its growth, we’ve decided to establish policies so that we can all be on the same page going forward, and so that members can better judge if this is the right group for them.

Group rules from the admins

1. This is not a repartnering group - repartnering is already a perfectly valid and socially acceptable option. This group is SOLELY for people who have chosen to **not** repartner, and have chosen to commit to the continuation of their relationship with their partner who died. Since people who choose not to repartner with a physical person are often faced with stiff opposition in general society and in “spiritual” groups, we have decided to be advocates for the social acceptance of the decision to not repartner and to remain solely committed to the partner in spirit.

Repartnering is already a valid, socially acceptable choice and there are many groups out there that offer support to those who choose to repartner. Repartnering is a choice that does not require explaining or defending in society or in this group.

As part of our advocacy and our desire to provide a comfort zone for those who make the choice to not repartner, we allow posts and comments from that perspective so members can support them. If you have repartnered, please do not take such comments as a judgement or negative evaluation of your decision to repartner as you help us support those who face this kind of opposition.

Comments and posts that appear to be arguing or debating the pros and cons of repartnering will be deleted. It is a personal choice not up for debate or comparison.

2. You must have a romantic partner who died - this group is solely for those who had a romantic partner with whom they were in a committed relationship when that person died. We are not a group for those with non-romantic loved ones who died.

3. You must have met your partner in person - you must have physically met and regularly saw your partner in person before they died.

4. Your relationship must be mutual - the person in question considered you their boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse at the time of their death.

5. Neither of you have other partners/spouses - your relationship must have been completely committed. One or both of you may not have another spouse or partner (no affair situations or "the one that got away" situations).

6. You may not be an ex - your relationship with the person in question who died must have been ongoing when they died. You may not be this person's ex partner. Note: This does not apply to couples who were together but experiencing relationship challenges when they died.

7. You are certain you don't want to date or remarry - *see #1. This is a group for you if you intend to remain committed to your significant other and learn how to interact with them even though they died.

8. No suicide/self-harm talk - absolutely no talk of self-harm or suicide anywhere in the group. This also includes sharing detailed descriptions of how people other than yourself engaged in self-harm/suicide. Because the focus of this group is learning how to live a happy, full life while in a transdimensional relationship with our partners, the group prohibits posts or comments that support, romanticize or glorify the taking of one’s own life as a means of re-establishing full contact with one’s partner. We understand healing and feeling closer to your partner is a process and we don't expect anyone to feel good all of the time, but we want to emphasize the group is not for rushing the end of one's life. We support living one's life to the fullest, with their partner in spirit right by their side.

9. No readings - we do not allow readings of ANY KIND within the group. This includes any method of trying to get information for someone else about their partner (cards, boards, pendulums etc.). This group focuses primarily on internal tools and methods for establishing and building our connection to our loved ones. There are other sites, groups and people that focus on EVP, mediumship, mediumship services, ITC, scrying, automatic writing, etc. Please do not post EVP recordings, scrying or ITC images, recordings, videos, images that may be of spirit faces or figures etc., or offer public, unsolicited information if you are a medium - in the FB Group or in the Zoom meetings. Zoom has a private chat channel you can use to ask reading permission and transfer that information privately. You can report and talk about such events or experiences, but we are not going to get into any discussions about what we can hear or not hear, see or not see, via such methods.

Mediumship information, if received, may be privately offered and given privately via off-group communication like direct messaging, email, etc. Then, if the receiver of the medium reading wishes to share it with the group, they may.

10. Respect everyone's privacy - being part of this group requires mutual trust. Authentic, expressive discussions make groups great, but may also be sensitive and private. What's shared in the group should stay in the group, meaning please do NOT divulge anyone’s name outside of the group or offer any information, images or recordings that could lead to their identification. Sharing stories or events from the group in a positive way to help others is acceptable as long as the privacy of the members is maintained.

11. Be kind, supportive and courteous - we're all in this together to create a welcoming, supportive environment. Let's treat everyone with respect. If you don’t have anything kind, supportive and courteous to say, don’t say anything.

12. This group will have NO DRAMA - we will not tolerate disrespectful comments about the experiences, views or lifestyles of other members. In order to help prevent this, all posts will require admin approval (this means that your post will not appear until and if we approve it). Any comment we find to be disrespectful, demeaning or negatively judgmental, or to be about private issues between members, may be deleted without notice and the author put on a “time out” while we contact them and discuss the issue.

13. This is NOT a debate forum - we are not here to judge or attempt to change the lifestyles, views and beliefs of others. You are free to have your beliefs without judgement, but proselytizing will not be permitted. During the course of discussion our individual views on things is bound to come up, please engage with civility, kindness and love.

14. Keep in mind the group subject - while conversations can range very widely in the comments of a post, please try to keep the posts you submit on-topic. This is not a general afterlife, metaphysics or paranormal information and discussion group - there are other groups that encourage posts that are solely about general information, ideas, etc. on those topics. While we allow some latitude here, we will be screening out posts that stray too far from our focus on the development of our romantic transdimensional relationship.

This is not a “spirituality” group, as odd as that may sound. Many people have different ideas of what that means, and some here have no interest in it. Some approach this in an entirely secular manner, so please keep that in mind. Again, we have some latitude here, but posts that make spiritual or religious claims, promote spiritual progress, or insist on a certain spiritual or religious view will probably not be approved and such comments may be deleted. This is not a position that such views are incorrect, but rather our way of better serving members that may have a wide variety of religious or spiritual perspectives, including entirely secular perspectives.

Also, posts that are links to mediums, mediumship videos, astral projection, EVP, ITC, NDEs, etc., which are not primarily discussing romantic trans-dimensional relationships will probably not be approved. If some outside source (like a video, book or web page) has content in it that you find applicable to our topic here, please make sure you describe how it relates to the topic and what benefit it gave you in the process of your relationship or understanding of it. Please do not submit posts asking for mediumship services, readings, etc.

There are other groups that already serve those interests. Here are a few groups you can join for that purpose:

Love and the Afterlife - run by Melanie Macione, who is also a member here. You can post mediumship reading requests and discuss spiritual views, among other things.

Afterlife Research and Education Discussion - Run by Victor and Wendy Zammit and also covers a fairly wide range of topics and discussion from a more spiritual advancement /spirituality-based perspective.

Thank you for helping us to keep our group focused specifically on support and discussion for romantic, trans-dimensional relationships! We have a wonderful group and we hate to decline submitted posts, so please keep all of the above in mind in deciding whether or not to submit here or elsewhere.

Conversations in Zoom meetings and our group chats are open to much wider discussions, but behavioral policies about privacy and behavior still apply.

15. No discussions about child rearing in the context of mediumship - we understand that many members have children and may have had children with their partner who has passed. We also understand that some members may not have had the opportunity to have children with their crossed-over partner for a variety of reasons. We do not want to discourage discussions about how to continue your relationship and remain an attentive parent OR whether or not we can have children with our partners someday in the afterlife. Those are safe topics that are encouraged.

However, we ask that members steer away from topics involving child mediums or any “mediumship development” with a child. It is entirely possible for a child to have gifts, but as we have gone through the physical loss of a partner, it is not possible to be impartial/unbiased about your/anyone’s child’s abilities. Furthermore, children cannot give consent to offering messages to a parent. In short, mediumship abilities exist at all ages, but we ask that you refrain from any discussion of an underage person giving you messages or acting as your medium. We, of course, discuss receiving messages from other adults or having readings from adults who practice mediumship.

16. Research, formal or informal - if you wish to query members about their experiences, or request interviews for the formal or informal purpose of gathering data, using our FB page, chats or Zoom, you must first secure permission from admin before proceeding. Be prepared to provide the nature and purpose of your inquiries as well as your intended usage for any information gathered.

17. Creating private chats and secondary Zoom groups - of course, anyone can reach out privately to anyone else in the group and do whatever they want away from the group. However, if you want to use the LAL chats, Zoom or FB page to publicly (in group) offer inclusion in any other group setting, you must offer it to everyone in that venue unless you have obtained prior permission from Admin to be selective.

However, if it comes to light that in any other-group interactions that you are sharing private group information with others who are not members of LAL, or are disparaging the group or members, you may be subject to expulsion from this group, depending on the circumstances. It’s okay to discuss experiences and generalities of the group with others, but do not divulge identities unless you have permission to do so.

18. Solicitations & links - from time to time members may post an FB post, comment or a chat comment about their group-related projects, business, books, creations, website, organization, etc. Posting links now and then to other related groups or sites is usually allowable, but is at the discretion of the Admin. Reposting links after Admin has given you a warning may result in expulsion from the group.

19. Complaints - if you have a concern or wish to report inappropriate behavior, please message one of the admins privately. Please DO NOT air out group or personal grievances, issues with the admins, our actions or our policies in this or other groups.

Thank you all for your support and efforts to make this a kind, helpful and supportive group! - The Love After Life and Red String Society admin team, and Mary Beth Spann Mank and William Murray, founders.